untitled

they say you never know what you got
till its gone
to lose you once made me realise
to get you back
made me protective
to lose you again
drove me insane

i sit comfortable in my lonliness
feeling like our nightmare is our reality
my nightmare fortunately isnt that bad
what tortures me?
the inability to keep you alive
in your cell
i am unable to keep a promise
without breaking a promise

wondering if theres a chance
a chance to sort the wheat from the chaff
a chance to start afresh
past forgiven and forgotten
praying your thoughts are deep
as deep as your mystery
i sit finding a loophole
writing for you
not to you
in hopes one day
you will read this
knowing deep down i kept
my lovers promise

i pray your mind is thinking of me

jheeze

bun you family like smaoking a phat rip ripping the piss like you pish blood but your just a period blud gotta piss in the water mate dont piss on yourself with your hate saying you hate water practise what you preach treating me like a mate bloods thicker than water only things thicker is money and custard thats why im stacked in filling with love lets get equal its a simple eqaution subtract the prick, the false images of eqaulity thats platinum h2o shit thats new skool to me you know nothing of og you gotta add some unconditional love to get a degree in my school too alumini for you going back to basics thinking your lifes a movie if you cant handle me at my worst you dont deserve my best so bestie lets get investing sis so hear up stop pissing in your blood blud

The playground

For Dylza Looking in the mirror amazed at how make up hides a multitude of sins looking natural and fresh eyeliner and mascara widening exhausted eyes bold lipstick sealing a mouth that utters truth quietly amoungst the lies tint of blusher caressing high cheek bones mimicking the shame i know longer feel bright green of my iris's is shockingly cold unable to glitter anymore knowing your absence crushes my soul love rediscovered lost purposely found cracked discarded again tattered reaching realisations with each clink of my lifes lottery balls its a losers lottery the jackpot is the last reserves of my strength to get up dust myself down to carry on a pitiful existance knowing love has no room for pornstars, gold diggers and the nieve when i left abrubtly quietly to where i came from i searched for something i needed from you in what i know now as the wrong place affection romance connection which i could never humble myself enough to ask from you i reached blindly searching trying to find me in our absence i created a life one aborted in hope we could have one day you once said you admired my strength which is now my downfall i wish i had the strength to tell you when you came back into my life about what happened on our absence i wasnt strong enough to overcome my fear of losing you again if i knew how it was going to turn out then maybe i could of summoned the courage to over rule my shame we went to bed before i could even think about telling youthen bed wasnt neutral ground i let it become a beautifuol battlefield side by side we watched eachother having nightmares and quiet down with touch sweet words and bitter discussions pass over time in various intoxicated states my resence of life dashed with fragments of me held in others eyes blended into the breakup which pushed us full circle with 2 rotations complete but not fufilled i step of our magical roundabout dizzy with pain and anguish i stumble to the swings to push myself into flying trying to get high enough to touch the clouds unable to i survey my playground as it turns to night the moon illuminates the roundabout sitting lonely abandonded far away you are no longer there a bolt of loss hits me like lightening the sky starts to weep with me in my desolution and the heavens drum out my destitution if this is natural and nature at its greatest then i will embrace this nakedly and be rejuvinated when we meet again i will be hesitantly perching on a slide this time i will not coax me to launch back on the roundabout instead i will wait wait for you to climb up and sit behind me wrapping me into you so we can launch ourselves over the roundabout like acrobats or wait for you to walk out of the park never looking back letting the dawn absorb you completely If i cant be the heroine to myself then i will be the heron patiently perching for you to come up one day even if that day never comes stubbornly steadfast waiting the summer out wondering if there is a next time will we see us beyond spring not knowing if now is the end of days or if we will see our days end together doesnt matter now so hush those ill thoughts clouding your mind the sun will come out one day and you will find me patiently perching perpetually waiting to be complete ready for the descent that readies us to ascend beyound the roundabout one day

love is a battlefield

Vodka emotion wound tight ready to shatter quivering tension ready to snap let the resevoir flow gushing destroying instead cold defient statuesque white flag waved as backs turnt evacuating the battlefield fight lost dignity grace kept head held high lake of tears now a drought fresh start pheonix metamorphising out of the ashes of lies into the flames of retribution hope calling distantly ignored by snow hate blanketing it wind of forgiveness stalled defeat blatent unrecognised silent battle no victor just casualties now trappeed in no mans land a detente ceasefire all nothing unsaid intamacy affection massacred blame accepted chances to fix destroyed thoughts feelings ponderous ressurection out of the window death of a soul death of life welcomed gratefully all lost eternally

end of days

Written in scotland 3 days before my nans funeral when me and my ex broke up! Stand in the line of fire take it embrace each shot to know you broke a diamond heart accept your own evilness face it owning it is brave meeting eyes irrelevant let the shame take you in its sorid arms resistance futile fall down take the beating its well deserved keep still play possum take the oppertunity to change to shed old patterns grew anew flip the tables on yourself take the hand offered prove to yourself to everyone you lost your losing will lose get up crawl into the new place start afresh come back with peace offerings with humility surprise pride transformation be the hermit be a vaugly familiar stranger change is good make it great do it its required needed wanted get back what you love lost who you're suppose to be you can do it

vengence

His vicious words whispered she cowers contained within herself unable to look into those eyes the ones that lured her in the ones she drowned in the ones that spew hatred She plays her part perfectly next morning she is merry singing in the bath tub she adopts the infamous attitude I dont give a fuck Your pain my pleasure You cant break me verbally Driven by his increasing fury She seems insensitive Aloof untouchable Phone goes she answers it nonchalantly Carries it to the bathroom locking herself in and him out Fist pound on the door her objective achieved he spits in her face after vomiting and digesting Doritos She suddenly chills he is acutely aware of this clear vision frozen fury vindictive thoughts hour later she emerges hitting the vodka ignoring the others laughing freely hyperactive she gets him alone turns to him with drunken sobriety asking one for the road? she gives him his constant request wordlessly her body flows seamlessly into sexuality her mind blank focusing on her goal as the objective is reached she moves away and falls into a dreamless sleep he sees her soul diminishing unable to see into her the games over weeks later she is unrecognizable open, honest and mysterious Remaining alone she finds herself discovering dashed dreams abandoned ambitions lost loves football shirt hidden in a draw awaiting to be ritually burnt fuel to fire rings in her head giggling at the irony knowing hes in his hell thinking that she is in hers however her hell is actually her heaven looking different sexier, grown up classy, feminine confident, fabulous Her revenge is bubble gum lipstick stained cigarettes and coffee cups professionally perfect

Nate - Life and Lyrics review

I meet this artist at a magazine Launch party, and liked his set, grabbed a copy of the mixtape and fell musically in love. Very down to earth. Despite the sleeve of the album says explicit material, no swearing but does say the words Religion and Politics which in todays society are slightly dirty words. Can't really do it much justice so download and listen, that way you can understand why I am umble enough to leave it as a simple review.

TRACK LIST
Intro - Very smooth soulful intro
Torn Apart - Fast paced but very deep, emotive, makes me think its the kind of tune perfect to wake up to to motivate you.
This life ft, Ophqi, Lexi and Bigcakes - Quite old style hip hop especially the backing vocals, makes me think of the summer when your chilling with an ice cream with the tune.
Bigger than Hip Hop - Very funny and grittily real, one of my favs on the album and was amazing performed live. The samples are tight and works really well in the tune, which is quite hard to do in this style.
Skit - Brilliant speech about television and really true when you think of it in this centuary
Tricknology ft, Dark Matter - a follow up from skit, political with out being political and the closest way I can describe it is a social commentry, this artist really knows how to grab his audience. Another favourite of mine and I would like to think I'm hard to please especially with Hip Hop, i personally think he is very like Eminem but a UK version. Continues the skit
Destiny ft Lexi - Solid drum beat, deep lyrics and beautiful collaboration with Lexi who has a very old school soul voice a mix between Witney Houston and Areatha Franklin.
What do you want ft Mr Kamara and Bigcakes - This tune winded my ears with a deep thought about religion, his male backing singer sound like Luthur Vandros with the big tone, and I love the sly jab at NDubz Dappy. Hi 5 for that!
Just Me - Inspiring is the only way I can describe it. Another great track performed exceptionaly well live. The bridge will make you join in garanteed!
Building ft Cyclonious and Dark Matter - Great melodic sample used, reminds me of Take The Lead final dance, very deep lyrics, really touches on why we need to help build a better future for the next generation.
Choices ft Dark Matter - Name says enough here, deep and very poetical.
Human Nature ft, Big Frizz and Jai - Big Frizz makes quite an impact on this and makes you take a look at yourself and what is it that makes us human in todays society
Outro - Nice piano with a very dirty beat and really lifts the album to a next level. Why is he not better known? This outro is humourous and will put a smile on your face.

http://beltdriven.posterous.com/nate-life-and-lyrics-free-download - DOWNLOAD NOW!!!!!!!!!

Break up - Poem

Tears roll down her face

Her voice is steady

Make up smeared

Begging you to have

Compassion,

Respect,

A heart.

She knows it was all a lie

All the

I love you’s

The compliments

The sweet talk

It was all to get into her knickers

She was just someone to

Inflate your ego

Take the piss out of

Hold at night when you felt lonely

You say

She lies

You don’t want to be tied down

She embarrasses you in front of everyone

But did you think

That she doesn’t;

Want to tell you the truth because you don’t let her in your heart

Want to tie you down when she has her dreams to follow

Want to feel like a fly on the wall and uncomfortable

You don’t

Listen

Treat her right

Let her know the side even your best friend doesn’t know

Because

You are scared of being fucked over

You don’t know how to listen

You try to hard to be dominate when there should be equality

You tell her

To just give in

To move on

To accept the unacceptable

She

Fights back

Opens up to you

Tries to reason with you

As she leaves the door

She

Holds herself together

Thinks about bouncing back

And never giving you another chance

You

Closed her heart down

Made her lose faith

Turnt her against her future


So she says bye

you sit in silence

the end has been solidified

Thank you

A glimpse into the bedroom -Poem

I begin to undress you with my eyes, then my hands

Taking my time to make you wonder what I’m gonna do next

I smother your skin in kisses working my way down

Your eyes are shut and you start to moan

You tell me you have never had an erection so deep

So my lips touch you above and below.

As you are close I languidly slip you out and slide down onto

You so our hips grind together. My hands on the headboard,

Your hands on my waist, eyes rolling into the back of your head,

I slowly get faster going from mellow to rapturous banging

We roll gracefully so I am on my back

I wrap myself around you, legs around your neck

Hands gripping the sheet, back arched in pleasure

My screams of euphoria encourage you until

We come together as one, my legs transfer to your waist,

My arms around your shoulders, hearts beating in unison

You murmur in to my hair, ’I love you’

I respond non committedly and unravel myself from you

And smoke a cigarette thinking ‘you don’t know what love is’

I put on my underwear and your T shirt and we lie watching a film

My head on your chest and I fall asleep knowing you don’t really love me

You just love fucking me. That doesn’t bother me because I feel the same.

My lust blinds me, fooling me into love. Comforted by the orgasm after glow I fall

Asleep knowing you can’t hear my thoughts. I know everything I say like

A script entitled - The girlfriend. it’s a script I’m fed up with, I cant edit it

So I recite it confused why our lines don’t fit together, like the way our bodies do.

Its ok I now know its because it was 4 months of lust not love.

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